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Where to find Pretoria’s craziest milkshakes

Looking for a little indulgence? From milk tart-flavoured to candy floss-topped creations,  these OTT milkshakes in the Pretoria area will cure any craving.

Afro-boer (Equestria)
Everything here is homemade, hearty and just plain delicious – milkshakes included. Order the vanilla café for a decent caffeine hit, or enjoy the comforting flavours of custard and cinnamon in the milk tart shake. Afro-Boer scores extra points for its delectable vegan option made from coconut ice cream and peanut butter.

Brooklyn Brothers (Lynwood)
Head chef Phineas and his friendly crew run a tight ship at this chilled spot with wooden benches, industrial touches and epic playlist running in the background. If you’re ready to consume a slightly obscene amount of sugar, try one of the three crazy shakes. With choc-fudge icing, a Kit Kat finger and a doughnut, the Brooklyn Heights takes indulgence to the next level. For less of a sugar high, try one of the more modest ‘Brooklyn’s Best’ shakes. The zoo biscuit option is infused with dreamy berry flavours and a dollop of sweet nostalgia.

 

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Burger Bistro (Clubview)
Burgers and milkshakes make for once iconic pairing and at Burger Bistro you can find the best of both. Don’t expect any fussy, over-the-top creations at this neighbourhood favourite. Burger Bistro serves a classic-look shake in 25 different flavours, which are helpfully divided into four categories: boring, not boring, fruity and adventurous. (The latter includes an intriguing avo option.) The crème brûlée shake delivers a deep custard and caramel flavour and goes down a treat with one of the scrumptious flame-grilled burgers.


Hudson’s (Hazelwood)
This laid-back burger joint in the cosy gastronomic hub of Hazelwood serves some truly spectacular shakes that’ll send you spiralling into a sugary orbit. The strawberry candy floss option looks like a soft, pink cloud and tastes every bit as sublime, while the salted caramel popcorn offsets the sweetness with a pleasant savoury crunch. Sweet, Instagrammable dreams are made of this.

 

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Kota Joe (Wonderboom)
Famous for affordable kotas (a quarter loaf of bread hollowed out and filled again), Kota Joe offers a classic roadhouse complete with clip-on trays and big screens. With their “Screw the diet” mantra, their vast range of delectable milkshakes are the ultimate calorific counterpoint to the clean-eating trend. The insanely indulgent milk-tart shake nails the flavour because, well, it contains actual milk tart. Other options include malva, white-choc berry, s’mores and tiramisu.

 

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Lucky Bread Company (Nieuw Muckleneuk)
A much-loved spot in Brooklyn Mall, Lucky Bread Co isn’t just famous for delicious sandwiches, pastries and coffee – they also make a mean milkshake. Purists will love the delicately creamy vanilla option. Other popular choices include the heavenly Lucky espresso and berry options.

 

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Milkshakes at Mustang Sally's

Milkshakes at Mustang Sally’s. Photo by Jacqueline Cochrane.

Mustang Sally’s Pub & Diner (Hatfield)
Mustang Sally’s is the undisputed queen of the Pretoria crazy shake scene. If unicorn anything is your vibe, you’ll love Kayleigh’s Smile – a rainbow-coloured, bubble gum-flavoured creation replete with various candy bits, sprinkles and a doughnut. The Nutella and peanut butter shake packs a punch unlike anything you’ve ever tasted. There’s also a variety of alcoholic ‘naughty’ options for tired adults who need more than sugar in their shake.

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